when I told her we had talked,
jealous maybe, or
perhaps
too scared to ride this
roller coaster alone,
and still want him on my side
when he clearly wants
to be on hers
Maybe he realizes that he betrayed
her trust by talking about her to me,
which is why he needs
to keep it secret,
scared the way I am
about
what she could do to
his life
if she felt he had been disloyal
after all, she had confided in him,
after all his kind
words,
promoting trust, with
me,
Judas, in the garden
giving a kiss to
Christ
as to let others know
who to crucify.
I knew I was
betraying him
when I did it,
and he knows I knew and aches
I think to get even for it,
as scared of losing her as losing his life,
a man caught between
two loves,
neither of whom he
wants to lose.
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