Tuesday, December 17, 2024

Taking the high road Dec 14, 2024

  

In reading the very early communications with our poet I realize just how deluded I was right from the start

I kept talking about taking the high road when I knew damn well I never intended to stick to it.

And that my hormones -- once they kicked in -- would send me down a twisted path from which I would never recover

The highlight of this of course was that day she did the food review and kept texting me later claiming she was texting her brother

I was a fish already hooked dangling and could not get myself untangled

Hormones have a nasty way of doing that to me and I wind up bobbing around like a cork on water with no idea of where I'm going or what I'm doing

This is made worse by the constant flow of photos you used to send via text or put up on Facebook and I would just lose myself

I was in a constant battle with myself, and knew that I was so smitten, I might give up everything just to satisfy her, give her total control over me.

Good old Dr. Thomas during one of our therapy sessions (He needed to play Dr. Freud while I wanted to win his admiration over my writing) told me that I was scared to lose control, even in emotional situations.

Only twice in my life did I come dangerously close to ceding this control to some woman: my ex-wife, and then in 2012, to our poet.

I would have been a happy camper to stumble behind her, doing her bidding, while another part of me resisted it.

The high road of course was me pretending that I was more noble than all of the other men who clearly wanted to be with her

Pure fantasy

In retrospect it was a time when I wanted to be consumed but was scared to take the plunge and so came back and forth and up and down and ultimately flaked out

I am utterly susceptible to such things probably even now although I'm not anywhere near brave enough to test the waters to see if I have learned anything

And for her there's this question as to whether what she was doing was deliberate or just a consequence of the situation

Did she know that she had the power to control people through her sexuality or did it just happen that way and she was as surprised as the rest of us

I go back and forth on it even now although I had a very cynical view in the aftermath of the bar thing and all of the stalking crap

Back then I believed that she was manipulating me and others

Overtime looking back I'm not sure that's the case and that she was just as confused by it all as I was

But one thing is certain there is no Noble road when it comes to love or lust and some men like me do not fare well once consumed by our own desire

 


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