Essentially, our former temporary boss is right about her.
She lives her life in terror; and down deep seems to fear men as much as she is attracted to them, assuming the worst as the same time she can’t live without them.
She seems to think all men pose a threat, even the unsuspecting and seemingly kind ones, although I still recall her comment last fall at one of our staff meetings when she said she didn’t hate men, she loved men, it was only some men she hated – and looked at me.
But she also once said on Facebook that she doesn’t need men, she has her cats.
All of that should be old news after so many months without contact, as I thought it was when she found someone to love.
She does, however, seem to admire people (men or women) who don’t hit on her.
“You’re one of the few politicians who hasn’t hit on me,” she told the Virgin Mayor’s arch rival at one point last year, while telling me much earlier how the Virgin Mayor frequently did.
This seems some kind of test few men manage to pass.
She seems to be constantly testing people – men in particular – to see how they will react.
This thought struck me back when she picked up the rapist rapper, she picked up a year ago April, as if she was testing to see how I might react to what she called “a working things out fuck.”
I didn’t pass the test.
Her replacement in our office may not have passed the test either, although he may well be innocent enough to truly find her admirable. He doesn’t gush so much as glows when he talks about her, even when he knows the truth of what happened between me and her.
I suspect she keeps close tabs on him more to keep hold of some of the power she had when she worked that beat, a kind of control by proxy.
With rumor that she is up for a $20,000 raise at her current town hall job, you would think her finances worry free. She was always harping on about how little she got paid at our office (something that turned out to be true) although at the same time she wound up with a new iPad and guitar, she claimed were early “gifts.”
Even her poems I am learning although the most honest (in a convoluted way) seem to test people. While an honest expression (apparently) of her current feelings, these poems tend to present uncomfortable truths.
This may explain some of the abrupt changes of tone her poems have taken recently, concluding (at the moment) with what may be a revival of defiance, blaming me for her downfall, and her promise for revenge.
She has a vindictive streak, shown several times when she mocked people – in particular men – when in the company of other women – one time I overheard though she was unaware I was nearby at the office.
The man she mocked – the Virgin Mayor’s arch rival – may have gotten the last laugh, however, if the legal case goes the way he expects. He apparently realized later how she had played him for a fool last December when she came to him looking for a job, and then took all his secrets back to RR and the Virgin Mayor. One of his aides told me flat out, she’ll be toast if and when the Virgin Mayor falls from grace.
After all, the Virgin Mayor gave her a job, and she owes him her loyalty.
But since the beginning of the year, there seems to have been some kind of falling out – perhaps due to her romantic entanglement which likely occurred with someone higher up in the gravy chain, slightly altering the trajectory she envisioned when first taking the job.
But she was included in the inner circle, spying for it, seeking to find dirt on their political enemies (and as in the cast of the Small Man and those associated with him) the Virgin Mayor’s allies.
Yet still, in one poem, she indicated she had taken on a lesser role (a problem for someone with a dual personality, who is both extremely insecure and extremely ambitious.)
But she obviously kept close to her replacement at our office, figuring he could act as a surrogate for what she could no longer do herself. She clearly has been feeding him story ideas (within the purview of a PR person, only she really isn’t the town’s PR person).
Perhaps, this relationship with her replacement got to close he told her I had confided in him about the events over the last year, and this may have resurrected her outrage towards me.
What comes next is a great mystery, only it appears she is as enraged at me now as she was over the summer, and I wonder how this translates into action on her part when some of the key people she relied on such as the Public Safety Director are gone.
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