poetry journal may 2012

 Vertigo (May 2012)

 

I get vertigo

Staring down at her face

Four story drop behind her,

A picture perfect moment

That is hardly perfect,

sent in the dead of night

to explain the pain

I’ve caused,

I ache to yank her back

But can’t.

She mistaking

A pull for a push,

Thinking I’m the one

Who wants her to fall

When I ache to keep; her safe,

Even if I’m to blame

For putting her there,

A fool doing a fool’s errand,

Unaware of the consequences

Until far too late,

Fearing that if she tumbles

She might take me with her

Over the edge

Into the abyss,

The deep darkness

That waits for both of us

To lose our grip.

 

email to Al Sullivan

Good bye Ruby Tuesday Aug. 6, 2013

 

I sing songs about this day

During my long trek

Down hill to the office

Tuesday Morning,

Which is never sweet,

Seated at a table

Where she no longer sits,

Her lingering spirit there

I feel but cannot see

slipping Tuesday Afternoon,

 a Moody Blues tune

for the mood I feel

the memory of her hateful stare

long vanquished

morphed into something sweeter

the sweetness of dying flowers

the haze of what might have been,

 could never been,

never was,

pined over,

like a dull pain missed,

going home to Rolling Stones ,

Good Bye Ruby Tuesday,

The girl who cashed in her dreams

Before they slipped away,

Leaving the faint scent

Lingering in me

With each step I take,

And the vague ghostly memory

Seated at the table,

Or looking out the window

all gone, yet not gone.

email to Al Sullivan

Breakfast of Champions April 2012

 

She hands me the bowl,

Her long fingers still stained

From slicing the contents,

A breakfast of champions

I think, as I settle

Side by side with her

On the couch,

Me feeling as I felt

Back at the diner,

Too nervous to eat,

Too attracted,

Feeling her heat

Her breath,

The intense scent

Of her perfume

I am a smoldering volcano,

Doing my best to keep

From erupting,

My fingers aching to touch

Places only my mind has been,

She too distant

On this painfully sunny day,

Sending me away,

Unsatisfied,

The way I must have

When I kissed her

And went away,

Going back down those long

Fights of stairs to the street

And the dazed walk,

Sober, but not sober,

Drunk on something other

Than wine,

Eggs and greens

A breakfast of champions

A tale told by an idiot

Or perhaps Dr. Seuss

My insides rumbling,

Empty,

But not from hunger.

 

 

email to Al Sullivan