Monday, November 6, 2023

Under suspicion July 23, 2013


Although I have not caught our owner snooping into my computers recently, I still believe he is trying to pin me down -- as is our former temporary boss -- to see just who I am talking to

whether it is GA the infamous Hoboken blogger or what I might be posting about our poet

I am not stupid even at those times when I'm in a deep fog

I have been around technology since the 1980s and know enough to distrust it

Although you can't always control the electronic trail you leave you can minimize what information there is

Anything sensitive anything about our poet for instance is handwritten.

As far as my communications with ga they are very limited and not electronic.

the few phone calls I have are done on the cell phone outside the office never using the office phone never using email and never posting anything online that might be used against me

this said I have made a few mistakes such as that idiotic move of posting her rooftop photo and worse my ignorance in posting the photo from her former job and upstate New York with I had not intended

almost all of my poetry and journal stuff about her including this are hand written and in many cases thought out while driving to and from the auxiliary office stopping to jot down in my notebook at traffic lights or if there is a particular moment of inspiration (ha ha) I pull over to the curb

these pages have become a kind of therapy for me jotting down my feelings and what I think is going on even when I later fine that what I first thought was an error

in truth I know very little even after more than a year of reading poetry and such and so these pages become a kind of exploration into what I don't know

that said the owner and our former temporary laws are apparently still on the hunt for clues that do not exist in any computer or on the Internet and if they check out my blog it is full of innuendo but very little information

I'm even wary of our poet and what she might read into some of my more legitimate poems and so I post old poems sometimes or completely go off subject just to make it clear that there are other writing going on besides about her

but in truth she is fascinating and perhaps the most fascinating person I have met since Peggy back in the late 1980s and her poetry and music is so intriguing, I can't resist it's like peanuts once you've had one you keep wanting for more

of course, a former temporary boss is so heavy handed in his exploration of where I am or what I'm doing I almost find it funny a kind of sideshow that keeps me entertained even though it is extremely risky playing games with him he has an agenda which it's nothing to do with work but probably everything to do with our poet

again, this is a supposition and I have no actual fact of what his motives are or even my owners and so I just play this cat and mouse game with everybody trying to stay under the radar in order not to be intimidated or worse fired.

everything of course is twisted up into local politics so the fact that the owners motives may have nothing to do with her even when I suspect they might and he needs to support a winning side in hometown in order to keep his ad revenues up and so any perception that I am somehow working with his political enemies makes me dangerous and vulnerable when in fact I am working for no One

unfortunately, I am a curious cat and all curious cats tend to get themselves in trouble curiosity dragging them into the mix this is always been my curse and it is my curiosity about her the poet that dragged me into the middle of this besides other factors such as my own basic motions my age and other things

but truth be told and despite what my owner and our former temporary boss may think I have kept my distance deliberately maybe a clever and elusive as one of her poems put it but remote and despite the fact that I suspect she thinks I'm still there in the mix I'm not everything has to be from a distance and always will be

this is not to say that I don't look forward to each of her new posting and well over them when they come out I do and though I infrequently check her Facebook page I do from time to time a kind of progress report to see where things are at but that's the limit and whatever the owner thinks or are temporary boss that's the my rules of engagement

I am aware of a Time when she will stop posting poetry and then my only real access to what is going on will be gone and that is the way of life as George Harrison says, and I often quote All things must pass.



email to Al Sullivan

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