Dolphins

1

If you stand long enough

And believe hard enough

They always come,

Rising and falling

As their hungry mouths feed,

I never see the fish,

Only the consumption,

Feeling each wave

Roll over the surface

Of the world,

My fins like their fins

Stretched out

Into the cool wind

Feeling for something real

Beyond myself,

Or perhaps deep inside

A knowing that after

All is said and done

I have landed where

I ought to have,

And kept faith

With these gods

I praise

2

This year I walk the promenade

and search hard the sea rim

needing them to come back into my life

as reward for doing almost all I could

to keep faith with them.

Perhaps missing last year

Attracted all these evil spirits

That swarm around me now

Spiritually devoid insects

Full of distorted visions

Of right and wrong,

Buzzing only relieved

By this wind off the sea

Where I once again

Can see clearly,

And ache for these angels

With fins

To rise up from their feeding

And feed me

3

The gulls that face the wind

Do not see the fins

Or hear the voices rising

Up from the sea

Only I do,

Even passers-by

Do not look where I look

They only look at me

Thinking I am crazy

For believing in something

They do not believe,

Searching the landscape

For some force for good

I can cling to,

To help me carry on

To give me strength

When all the tides

Of the world have

Turned against me,

So when the fins appear

I know I am right

For being here,

For waiting for it,

For believing in it,

Even if others

Still do not see

4

They come the last day

Of a three-day stay

In Cape May

As if needing to make

Sure we are worthy enough

For us to see them or

For them to see us,

Their fins rising over

The phony fins

The gray waves create

Illusions we must not

Believe in,

False prophets

Promising love

In their pursuit of profits,

Those who cast confetti

Into the wind,

Hoping for a cash crop

They can reap later

While when the illusions fade

The real fins rise

From a real sea

Speaking of real love

Bright in a real light of day.

5

I rush up the beach path

And reach the lip

Just in time to see

The lifted fin vanish

Beneath a wave,

Then more appearing

Angels in the ripped

Surfaced of the sea,

A sea I’ve craved for

But now can’t dip a toe in

For the cold,

This place

This time of year,

Part of a ritual

I can’t live without,

A holy moment

When I can become whole

When I test myself against

The edges of truth

Like a store keeper

Tests the life of a battery,

And this year,

I still stand on the right side

Still testing positive

And still can face myself

In the brisk unrelenting

Blow of the ocean wind.

6

I watch the dolphins dance

As I write in the wet sand

The perpetual waves erasing

Each word before it is done

Taking these out into the sea

As prayers to some hopeful god

So that in the end

I remain still standing

As all words wash away

Taking away the deceptive reflections

Wet sand always brings

The mirrored self-centeredness

The illusions of righteousness

The fallacy of personal ambition

Cast down like false gods

Leaving only the echo

Of the laughing gulls

As they sweep the sky

Above in their mockery

Al Sullivan's webpage